ACT I SCENE I. Windsor. Before Page’s house Enter Justice Shallow, Slender and Sir Hugh Evans.

SHALLOW.

Sir Hugh, persuade me not. I will make a Star Chamber matter of it. If he were twenty Sir John Falstaffs, he shall not abuse Robert Shallow, esquire.

SLENDER.

In the county of Gloucester, Justice of Peace and Coram.

SHALLOW.

Ay, cousin Slender, and Custalorum.

SLENDER.

Ay, and Ratolorum too; and a gentleman born, Master Parson, who writes himself “Armigero” in any bill, warrant, quittance, or obligation—“Armigero.”

SHALLOW.

Ay, that I do, and have done any time these three hundred years.

SLENDER.

All his successors, gone before him hath done’t; and all his ancestors that come after him may. They may give the dozen white luces in their coat.

SHALLOW.

It is an old coat.

EVANS.

The dozen white louses do become an old coat well. It agrees well, passant. It is a familiar beast to man, and signifies love.

SHALLOW.

The luce is the fresh fish. The salt fish is an old coat.

SLENDER.

I may quarter, coz.

SHALLOW.

You may, by marrying.

EVANS.

It is marring indeed, if he quarter it.

SHALLOW.

Not a whit.

EVANS.

Yes, py’r Lady. If he has a quarter of your coat, there is but three skirts for yourself, in my simple conjectures. But that is all one. If Sir John Falstaff have committed disparagements unto you, I am of the Church, and will be glad to do my benevolence to make atonements and compremises between you.

SHALLOW.

The Council shall hear it; it is a riot.

EVANS.

It is not meet the Council hear a riot. There is no fear of Got in a riot. The Council, look you, shall desire to hear the fear of Got, and not to hear a riot. Take your vizaments in that.